It really hit me hard today

I miss my mother so much! I haven't felt like this since the day of her funeral. I don't know why it is hitting me so hard, but I really want her here with me.

As I was cleaning the toy room I had Christmas music playing. Then all of a sudden the tears began. Poor Breanna didn't know what was going on and I tried to explain that I missed "Nanny". So she said we should go visit her and Papa. She doesn't remember mom and she will never know her.

This year, I haven't been excited about Christmas and I couldn't figure out why. I think its because mom was always the person who got me excited. It was her favortie time of year. She was excited to see our tree and the lights on our house. She went all out at Christmas!

I just really, really miss her!